15 weeks

•How far along?: This last Friday we reached 15 weeks. Currently I'm 15 weeks 4 days.

•Current Weight: Staying strong at 136 :)

•Total weight gain: 6lbs

•How big is baby?: Roughly 5 inches

•Maternity clothes?: Just a bellyband still. Tomorrow I'll be purchasing a pair of maternity shorts. It's just too hot.

•Stretch marks?: Nope!

•Sleep?: I'm asleep by 730pm, but this is also due to the fact that I get up at 330 every morning.

•Food cravings?: Peaches, pizza & ice cream.

•Labor signs?: No, and we'll keep it that way!

•Belly button in or out?: Innie

•What I miss: Fitting in my pants. Hah

•What I'm looking forward to: Finding out what this little Bean is! I'm fairly certain that this baby is a girl, as are both my sisters and mother. Every one else says boy. We'll see!

Is it weird?

When my cats do something bad (i.e. scratch the sofa) I yell at them. Hello, custom Italian leather does not need to be used as a scratching post. Pre-pregnancy I'd clap my hands and chase them away. Now? I gently pick them up and say, "You can't scratch the sofa. It's very expensive and you have so many toys." Then I put the cat down and feel proud of myself for explaining why they can't do something. I realized I'm seriously practicing my parenting skills on my cats. Holy shit.


But how can you yell at a face like this?


Or this?


Or her? Aka the Princess of the House


I'm starting to wonder how these three are going to take it when a baby comes in December ...

More dreams...

As most know (or don't?), I'm getting married in 108 days. I had always heard of brides having wedding dreams about things going wrong, etc etc, but I never experienced it and thought I got lucky. ... Until two nights ago. The night before last I had this major freak-ass dream about forgetting my dress - in another state. I literally woke up for this shit clutching my sheets and sweating. NOT only did I forget my dress, but the freakin' processional started without me being ready! How could they do that to me! When I didn't show up Mr G thought I left him at the alter. Yes - he thought his partner of 4 and a half years and mother-to-be of his child flat left him at some random church on Long Island. Poor Mr G. When the dress finally arrived, I made everyone and their mother re-do the processional. All ended happy happy, but wtf?! I forgot my dress! By the way, this is a legit fear, as I currently live in a different state from the one I am to be wed in.

Last nights dream was a little different. I was in a big black pick up truck and as I got out I feel into a HUGE lake and got covered in mud. What does THAT mean? As per some random dream symbol thing I got off google:

Lake

To see a lake in your dream, signifies your emotional state of mind. You feel restricted or that you are unable to express your emotions freely. Alternatively, the lake may provide you with solace, security, and peace of mind. If the lake is clear and calm, then it symbolize your inner peace. If the lake is disturbed, then you may be going through some emotional turmoil.

So, wait - emotional turmoil? I just figured that I subconsciously feel "in-over-my-head" with a wedding in 108 days and a baby due in 176! Yeah - that sounds right.

Now between these dreams, getting up every REM cycle to pee and being turmoiled (<- I rock making up my own words) emotionally, I assume that sleep is officially a thing of the past. Such a shame, I enjoyed sleep.

Boobies

Boobs. I swear if I hear one more person tell me how big my boobs are I'm going to flip. No joke. Before I got pregnant I weighed 130lbs, now at 14 weeks and 4 days I'm 136. Not that big of a difference. So why the hell did my boobs go from a 34B to a 36D? There's no milk there, yet. Not only that, but my boobs are ugly! EWWW. How can ANYONE feel sexy when their boobs look like aliens abducted them?!

After picking up the rest of Mr G's father's day gift I ran over to Target to buy some new bras. I ended up buying a lift and support bra as well as a nursing bra (<-- hello. most comfy bra EVER!) I tried to take pictures but I can't figure out that whole picture in mirror thing. Plus I sort of hate how I look right now... So, you all are just going to have to wait.

Yeah. Pregnancy gives you imagine issues. I never though I'd complain about being pregnant. Not with everything I've been through as far as fertility goes - but holy F! Forget your boobs being abducted by an alien.. your entire body is abducted by another human being! Yeah yeah, I'm sure it'll all be worth it! No, seriously - I know it will be, but dear God I just want my boobs back!


By the way, for the father's to be, get "The Guys Guide to Surviving Pregnancy, Childbirth and the First year." I sat in the parking lot of Barnes and Noble and read half of it before I realized what the hell I was doing and left to come home. Yeah, it's that good.

Don't touch me. Don't look at me.

Ever have those days when you just don't want to be bothered? When the thought of a simple conversation makes your skin crawl and it takes everything in you to not punch the other person. Welcome to pregnancy. Every.Single.Day.

Here are a few lessons about pregnancy:

1.) This is directed to fathers-to-be, mainly, anyway. Do not tell you wife that she has done something wrong. Even if she has done something wrong, keep your mouth shut. Sometimes woman take shortcuts to get everything they do in the day done. I.e. Load the dryer a little more than they should. Big freakin' deal. Please do yourself and her a favor and treat her like the sun shines out of her ass 24/7. For the love of all things holy, she is creating another human being. So, just shut the F up and turn the dryer back on.

2.) To the random public - DO NOT, under any circumstance, TOUCH MY BELLY. ::coughgirlatworkcough:: Stay the hell away. If I'm resting my arms across the small bump I have that generally means I DO NOT want you to touch it. Take a fucking hint and back the fuck off.

3.) My fellow pregnant ladies, your emotions are running high. You cry when the pedigree commercials come on. You look at pictures of your friends newborn and dream about the day you get to bring home your bundle of joy. This is normal. At any given moment you may toss your blackberry across the room and short it's motherboard. Try to refrain if you can. If you can't, at least you have an excuse.

I'm a bad blogger.

Really really bad. I'm the kind of person who will be driving and say to myself, "OH! That'd make an awesome blog post!" Then I forget, which is totally terrible. The really sad thing is that I love to write. I have books and books of random things that have crossed my mind at some point or another.... And yet, I can't seem to figure out this whole 'blog' thing. In all honesty, who the hell wants to read about my every day pregnancy occurrences - like heartburn and gas - or the fact that I should be cleaning my kitchen right now? Probably no one. Regardless, here I am typing away about to update the hell out of anyone who crosses this blog.

First - let me just say that time FLIES. Today marks 14 weeks - aka the start of my second trimester. It's a little surreal. I don't feel pregnant and I don't really act pregnant, with the exception of eating every two freaking hours. I'm sure things will start to feel a lot more real in the coming weeks when we find out the sex and feel some movement. Until then, this is my attempt to update you:

How far along are you? 14 weeks
How big is baby? The size of clenched fist, as per What to expect.
Maternity clothes? Nope. Just a bellyband.
Weight – Loss or Gain? I gained 6lbs so far and holding steady. Even though I eat every few hours, I've been eating a shit load of fruits and veggies. I'd love to be downing brownie sundaes every night, but the fact is, I still have a wedding dress to fit in to :\ I'm also very concerned about what goes into my tummy - if this peanut is a girl, I want to give her every fighting chance against Endometriosis.
Stretch marks? No. Hopefully this is due to the fact that I lather myself in coco butter two times a day.
Sleep: Good so far. Except I'm tired all.the.time
Best moment this week: Scheduling our anatomy ultrasound!
Any Movement?: Not yet
Food Cravings?: Peaches. Peaches. Peaches.
Food Aversions?: Lamb :( Thai food :(
Belly Button in or out? Innie for now
What are you looking forward to: July 8th!


13 weeks

14 weeks

Super nose

I smell... Everything. I smell celery from five feet away, I can tell what you are cooking before you actually start cooking it and it all makes me gag. Evidently I have super hero preggo nose.

Our Little Miracle!

How far along are you? 6 weeks, two days
How big is baby? Tiny
Maternity clothes? Not yet, but I've been using a beBand here and there
Weight – Loss or Gain? Not really
Stretch marks? Nope!
Sleep: If I could sleep all day, I would.
Best moment this week: Hearing the Bean's heartbeat.
Any Movement?: Not yet
Food Cravings?: I was craving Publix subs ... but morning sickness has nit so I don't want much of anything.
Food Aversions?: Almost everything.
Belly Button in or out? Innie for now
What do you miss: Not feeling sick 24/7
What are you looking forward to: Feeling the Bean move
What was the BEST part of this week? Seeing and hearing the Bean
What was the WORST part of this week? Gagging every time I open the fridge
Weekly Wisdom: Just relax :)
Milestones: Being pregnant!

I'm sure it was a man...

...who thought of the name 'morning sickness' because in NO WAY does this feeling go away after 12pm. Oh, no, it comes on full force, knocks you between the eyes and says, "HA! Go open the fridge and GAG!" And after that, when you are feeling a little bit better and craving pizza Morning Sickness says, "Pizza. Oh, that sounds tasty. Yes, yes ... let's try some pizza," while quietly snickering to herself... knowing full well that just the sight of pizza will send me straight to the bathroom.

Eff you morning sickness! Eff you are your dry heaving, vomit inducing, gagtastic ways!

Dear wedding dress,

When I first tried you on I felt amazing. Like a princess. No, seriously - I did. It hugged my hips the right way and my boobs looked perfect (which happens only on rare occasions!). There wasn't too much bling, no no - just enough to make me look radiant. We knew it was the one when Mother cried. She shed tears of joy and we all cried and hugged and laughed in excitement. Well, we didn't exactly hug and laugh in excitement, but tears were shed!

Yesterday I picked you up and right now you are hanging in the guest room in all your wonderful wedding dress glory. But ... I'm pregnant which means there is a small chance you and I may never get the chance to dance the night away together. What is a pregnant bride to do? I have daily talks with Bean to wait until after the wedding the make Mommy fat, but there is no guessing what children will do. They tend to have a mind of their own. So, in the meantime, as you hang beautifully from the closet I will try my hardest to stop eating pasta and ice cream. It's not good for the baby anyway, right?

Oh, wedding dress. How I hope for us to meet again very soon. Maybe on the night of September 26th, 2010? I hear there's this awesome party going on.

Sweet dreams are NOT made of these

I hate scary movies. Yes, I'm a chicken little. Anything involving monsters, murders and saws freaks me out to no end. Every time a commercial for a scary movie comes on, I rush to the remote to change the channel. So now that this new Nightmare on Elm Street (FYI I'm shuddering at just typing the name and lifting my feet up from the side of the bed) is coming out, I've thoroughly become the little kid who checks her closet before going to sleep.

Now, I never dream. Or I should say, I never did dream - up until now. Pregnancy brings on a whole new meaning to 'active imagination.' Instead of dreaming up pictures of cute little infants in my head during my REM cycle, I'm running away from Freddie Kruger (OMG, I said his name! ::hides under covers::). Last night at around 3:45am I had to pee so bad, but I had just woken from Freddie grabbing me. I looked around the room, noticed I was fine and said to myself, "Stop being a dork, go pee." Then I said to myself, "No! What are you stupid? He's hiding behind the shower curtain!" So, of course, like any rational 25 year old adult, I stayed in bed wiggling because I had to pee so bad. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, my very own pregnancy derived opportunity cost. The cost of getting up and possibly being attacked by a FAKE character outweighed the possibility of a UTI. Eventually the fact that I may pee in the bed came about and I had no choice but to get up and urinate (I swear I heard my bladder sigh in relief). No monster grabbed me from behind the shower curtain, nothing was waiting for me by the window and I got back into bed safely and soundly.

I still hate scary movies, though.

And then there were boobs.

Last August I had my third lap. At my weigh in before I was a whooping 140lbs. Yeah, fatty, I know. But because I had surgery on my bowels, I wasn't allowed to eat. For five days. Only clear liquids. So, needless to say, I lost weight. A lot of weight. Roughly 20lbs. I lost a majority of it in my boobs - I went from a 36 C to a 34 B basically over night. It was fabulous!

Enter pregnancy.

Now, I haven't gained too much in the way of weight. I had gone up to 128 from around October to December (thank you winter holidays) and am currently 132. Funny, though ... my pants still fit great because all the weight is back IN MY BOOBS. Not cool. I can see it now. My boobs will far out grown my belly. I know it. I can sense it. My bra is so snug. Mr G. is taking me out tonight to get new ones. :: le sigh:: Most women would be jumping for joy.

Since we hit the 6 week mark, I decided to start the belly pictures.



No bump yet! Don't mind Mr G's shorts. Haha. I secretly lounge in them when he isn't home. It'll be interesting to keep tract of my belly pictures, I'm sure! I'm actually pretty excited to see how everything progresses!

BFPs, Betas & Burritos. Oh my!

Those who don't know me don't know my struggle with Endometriosis, obviously. They don't know the surgeries I've had, the drugs I've been put on or the painful tests I've been through to determine how to save my fertility. After a long battle Mr G. and I got the shock of our lives. A big fat positive HPT. Well, actually four big fat positive HPTs...



At our first OB appointment, my midwife ordered a round of beta testing to make sure that the lurpon I was previously on wasn't causing any issues. The first round came back perfect! Our first ultrasound is April 19th :) In the meantime, I've been craving mexican like crazy! Along with Publix subs. I've never had my mouth water over food like this before! Hope the morning sickness stays away.

Stay tuned for more updates on us and the Tadpole!